Thinking that your child had entered the terrible twos and then realizing that those early tantrums were nothing compared to the hideous creature rearing it’s head at you now, is very disheartening. Kind of like thinking that you’re in active labor and then slowly realizing that those terrible pains were just the pre-show entertainment. Honestly, I’m just trying not to lose it on him most of the time. I feel like all I do is correct bad behavior and take things away all day long. From morning til night its a battle that rages on with no victor.

I don’t like myself very much right now and I’m pretty sure that no one else in this house does either. It’s harder at the moment because I’ve got pregnancy hormones coursing through my body making me even more unable to deal. Patience, which has never been my strong suit, is almost nonexistent. I’m thinking that Kofi and I need to sit down and make a game plan for making our way through this difficult phase in which Miles is hunkering down. What are the rules? Where are the lines that can’t be crossed? What deserves a time out, toys taken away, stern talking to or just walking away to let him cry it out on his own. And here’s where I loose points with a lot of people, but when is a spank appropriate? I believe in a spanking when the act is soooooo bad that a time out or harsh discussion just isn’t going to cut it. I was spanked when I was a kid, not often, but when I was reeallly out of line (like running into the fields with my sister when the combine harvester was working). I never did it again, that’s for sure. I don’t feel that I was abused in any way, but my mom got her point across loud and clear.

Miles is a very cleaver boy and he knows just what to do to get on my last nerve. Things like yelling, “NO!” and “I don’t want to!” about any little thing I ask him. Even if it’s something he really wants to do. He just wants to be obstinate right now about everything. It’s frustrating, but most of all, exhausting.

I know that my story is not unique in any way. Like most parents with toddlers, I just need to know that there will be an end to all of this power tug of war.